Flying Discs, Swords, Fans and the TRUTH
Author: A discussion paper by Simon Slieker (man)
Friday, December 8, 2006
It's not unusual to encounter a flying disc at your typical outdoor party. Whether hoisted by children or wierdos, they commonly take up residence at some centralized public tract; not quite out of the way enough to be out of the way, yet out of the way enough to appear benign. Be warned, the Flying Disc in the right hand (or left) can be a devastating weapon.
Frisbee or Date Rape Drug-
Such is the discreet charm of the Frisbee (sic) (latter term for the flying disc, currently the brand name owned by Whamo Inc. Beware of this when bandying the appellation for the flying disc. You are publicizing a brand. Just like Roller Blades to Inline Skates so to is Frisbee to the Flying Disc), that even when in striking range to oblivious passers by, they remain blissfully unaware of the danger they are in. Should one of these discs happen to "take you out" you will not wake up from the date.
Reading the Danger
The strike range of a flying disc is dependent on it's weight and shape. Characteristics such as concentric circles moulded into the upper side of the disc and the curve and depth of the lip dramatically affect it's flight and aerodynamic behaviour. The better the design of the disc the more functional it is in the air…the more precise.
So as a good starting point in gauging the danger in which you and your party friends may find yourselves, first assess the disc in play. Ask yourself these questions:
1. Is the disc holding it's line of flight-
2. Is the disc lighter than 175g-
That's a pretty good starting point. If it isn't holding it's flight and it's lighter than 175, then it's one of those abominations you can by from the newsagent on the foreshore at Lorne in the Christmas holidays. No more a weapon than a tennis ball is next to a grenade. Walk on by, sure in your judgement, you and your friends will not be harmed.
If on the other hand it's heavier and seems to be holding flight (subject to a decent throw) then you may be observing something like a Discraft Ultrastar 175gram Worldclass Ultimate Model disc, or even worse (if it's narrow in diameter) it may be a Disc Golf disc. If either of these is the case you're in trouble.
I'm in Trouble! What Next-
Try not to alarm your friends; keep an eye on the disc in play and if you can, read where it's headed, then make a quick assessment of that player. If they at all resemble a Flying Disc Assassin then you must act quickly. (See Appendix 1A for more detail on Flying Disc Assassins).
In a calm voice, with your eye on the assassin say this to your crew:
"Listen to me everyone: I don't mean to alarm you, but we're in the strike zone of a flying disc assassin. Ok, on my mark, I want you to follow scatter plan A." (For more information on designing scatter plans for party problems see Appendix 1B: Knowing When to Scatter or Cluster When Things Go Wrong).
Then when your team is ready to move and you are in an intercept position call out: "MARK!" If you are concerned about people operating under the name Mark, then you should really use an alternative signifier like: "Engage", or something else Captain Jean Luc Picard would say.
OK now you know how to identify the danger of a game of "Frisbee" and how to get away from it.
Next time we'll look at the role of Flying Discs in dance culture: From Weapon to Ambassador of Peace. We'll examine the humble beauty of the Flying Disc and look at why they are so important to modern DJ's.
Appendix 1A
How to identify a Flying Disc Assassin
FDA's usually embed themselves into groups of people hanging out in party environs. When engaged in converation they are easily detected, as they can't help themselves from using such terms as: target, collateral damage and night vision goggles. If you hear any of these words look for these other tell tale< Tags