Hellboy: The Science Of Evil
Xbox 360 / PS3
Just in time for the movie release, this terrible movie tie-in game has hit the shelves. It seems every time there’s a superhero movie there’s also a very rushed and very bad game to follow.
You would be stupid to buy this game just because you like the Hellboy character. Hell, I feel stupid for watching the movie sequel just because I liked the original character. In fact, hell is the only place fit for players of this game. I feel so dirty. Luckily I didn’t pay for the movie or the game.
You play as Hellboy (but with no eyeballs; they were cutting pixels to lower overheads), and it is your task to stop a Nazi plot of world domination. It will take six whole boring, button bashing, punishing chapters to do so. The combat system that controls the action in Hellboy: The Science of Evil is weak and repetitive and you’ll soon get tired of it. You smash out a few old moves likes punch, throw, kick and battle on through an endless tirade of undead creatures.
This game lacks intensity. The fighting is slow and the sound effects are tinny. No atmosphere is created to heighten the tension that is supposedly happening on screen. If you listen carefully you can hear the background music looping every minute or so. It’s like a bad PC action title from the ‘90s.
You’ll have to kill all the enemies each stage before moving onto the next, just like you did when playing Double Dragon on the Sega. Back then that was kind of awesome, now - with a $99 price tag - it’s kind of pathetic. Although you get to visit a diverse list of locations, it still seems bland and mundane and you are forced down a strict path all the way. This is so you don’t miss any one. If you do, the camera mechanics will make it very difficult to turn around and track back... But you have to if you want to move on; everything must die.
Playing online or split-screen, you can also choose to play multi-player using either Abe Sapien or Liz Sherman. But you’d really have to hate someone to make them play through any part of this game with you. I was ready to kill myself for having to sit though the idiotic cut-scenes alone, that, by the way, cannot be skipped through. The things we reviewers must do.
Basically, if you buy/rent this game be prepared to [hate it and] spend all your time smashing the punch button. It’s also very easy. The enemies hardly attack you and after a while they just stop moving and wait for you to come to them to administer a beating. It’s like they’re bored being in the actual game. Hellboy doesn’t really need to block or defend either as even a crowd of oncoming creepy corpses won’t put a dent in your life bar.
In the end this game is woeful and shouldn’t have been made. But if you’re a hardcore Hellboy fan who is 12 years old and has social issues, you’ll love it. The only other game I reviewed this harshly was another movie tie-in title, X-Men. Both games are now tied with string and hanging on my mother’s fig tree to ward off birds from stealing the fruit.